Thursday, September 29, 2016

Comedic Chatter

I really hate those Viagra commercials that come on during sporting events.  Here you are trying to enjoy some quality sports time.  All of a sudden this heifer, wearing a blue outfit to symbolize the blue Viagra pill, pops up and tells you how convenient the 1 pill packages are to give you a 4 hour erection, whether you want one or not.  If you notice the female is doing all the talking in the commercial.  The man doesn’t say one word.  Do we know if he wants to have sex?  Is she forcing him into taking the pill so she can have 4 hours of sex?  We don’t know.  If the commercial is really for men, then let the man talk in the commercial!  We want to hear what he has to say about a 4 hour erection!  Put the man in a blue outfit.  Picture this commercial.  A man is a blue jumpsuit is walking along a crowded street.  He sees all these pretty women along the street.  He starts fantasizing about them sexually.  But his private body parts don’t react to his thoughts.  So he pops in a one pack pill of Viagra.  In less than half an hour he starts walking along the crowded street with a noticeable erection.  The women he encounters either smile at him or look revolted.  Then cut to four hours later with the guy leaving a brothel.  Fade out of the scene with the words “4 hours and $200 dollars later.”

I heard it from a reliable source that all the cops who kill black people save the administrative pay they get while under “investigation”. They use that money for travel arrangements to “White Town” an all white community in Montana where  all white cops who killed black people go to as a safe refuge.  At last count the population was like 740,000 people including the families of the cops.  What folks don’t know is that they also get checks, cash, gift cards in the mail from “American patriots” as an off the books reward for killing a Negro.

Another white cop filed a false police report.  You heard about that?  This one white cop showed up at the station all beat up and without his squad car.  So he says this black man, about 6 feet 11 or 7 feet, 295 pounds beat him up at a traffic stop.  Right away I’m thinking, did he stop Shaquille O’Neal?  The cop said the black gargantuan grabbed his taser and gun and crushed them both in the palm of his hand.  Then the cop said the black gargantuan threw the balled up metal into the sky where it kept on going and going up and finally exited the atmosphere into outer space!  Of course Fox News ran the story like 45 times within an hour of the cop reporting it.  The Governor called out the National Guard and a Negro Alert was issued to locate this Shaq look alike.  The story quickly fell apart when a video surfaced showing the cop being robbed by 3 prostitutes and their Pimp taking his police car.

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