I realized two days ago that there are some significant generational differences between black fathers of today and the period when I was raising my 2 sons. I made the mistake of posting a viewpoint on a social media outlet about a scenario I was encountering as a father. The comments I received back were very argumentative, judgmental and disrespectful. I could tell that they were comments of fathers who were likely at least 15 to 20 years my junior.
It is my belief that the values of these black fathers are not the same as the values that I learned and tried to apply as a father. These fathers seemed to support t!he disrespectful antics of their grown adult children as being allowable because the kids are now grown. Their viewpoint seemed to be that once a child reaches the adult hood age a parent does not have a right to give that adult child any more advice or opinions! For them parent hood ends when the child becomes an adult.
I did not know parents were allowed to wipe their hands of their children's behavior once they turned 18 or 21. It seems like today's generation believes parents only have limited rights to speak up and that time period covers only 18 to 21 years old.
My point to these dysfunctional fathers was that if we as parents have information or opinions that can help, don't feel you can't talk to your children just because they are grown. Especially in the area of finances if the child can learn from good or bad financial decisions you make.
After that incident I voluntarily left the social media platform I had been interacting with and left all the social media groups I had signed into. I was looking for like minded people or people who wanted to dialogue thoughtfully about an issue. I found neither of those on social media. I just hope the majority of black fathers do not have the opinions and values I read that day!
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