After many attempts to offer help to family members and to offer my time in volunteer activities, I have come to the conclusion that it is better to have people approach me for help. My initiatives to offer help to family members were often met with silence and no response. I think people truly believe they do not need help or that they did not value my offer or felt I could not help them. Such is life. I recall when I was young I rarely sought help also. It must be in our human make up to think that we can solve all of our own problems.
I have learned that the experiences of others and the knowledge of others can benefit me. I know I do not know everything about life to be able to address all of my concerns. Having someone to turn to for advice, whether it be a friend or mentor is a bonus. As a black male I often find myself with no one who looks like me to turn to. So I continue making decisions by myself..
Instead of pouting about my inability to be of use to someone else, I have decided to move on and just enjoy life to its fullest. Maybe in my adventures I will come across someone who will seek my advice. Reaching out to organizations or specific family members is no longer on my agenda. It it is meant to be they will find me. Until then.....my life continues.
Friday, May 10, 2019
Sunday, May 5, 2019
Black Fathers Generational Differences
I realized two days ago that there are some significant generational differences between black fathers of today and the period when I was raising my 2 sons. I made the mistake of posting a viewpoint on a social media outlet about a scenario I was encountering as a father. The comments I received back were very argumentative, judgmental and disrespectful. I could tell that they were comments of fathers who were likely at least 15 to 20 years my junior.
It is my belief that the values of these black fathers are not the same as the values that I learned and tried to apply as a father. These fathers seemed to support t!he disrespectful antics of their grown adult children as being allowable because the kids are now grown. Their viewpoint seemed to be that once a child reaches the adult hood age a parent does not have a right to give that adult child any more advice or opinions! For them parent hood ends when the child becomes an adult.
I did not know parents were allowed to wipe their hands of their children's behavior once they turned 18 or 21. It seems like today's generation believes parents only have limited rights to speak up and that time period covers only 18 to 21 years old.
My point to these dysfunctional fathers was that if we as parents have information or opinions that can help, don't feel you can't talk to your children just because they are grown. Especially in the area of finances if the child can learn from good or bad financial decisions you make.
After that incident I voluntarily left the social media platform I had been interacting with and left all the social media groups I had signed into. I was looking for like minded people or people who wanted to dialogue thoughtfully about an issue. I found neither of those on social media. I just hope the majority of black fathers do not have the opinions and values I read that day!
It is my belief that the values of these black fathers are not the same as the values that I learned and tried to apply as a father. These fathers seemed to support t!he disrespectful antics of their grown adult children as being allowable because the kids are now grown. Their viewpoint seemed to be that once a child reaches the adult hood age a parent does not have a right to give that adult child any more advice or opinions! For them parent hood ends when the child becomes an adult.
I did not know parents were allowed to wipe their hands of their children's behavior once they turned 18 or 21. It seems like today's generation believes parents only have limited rights to speak up and that time period covers only 18 to 21 years old.
My point to these dysfunctional fathers was that if we as parents have information or opinions that can help, don't feel you can't talk to your children just because they are grown. Especially in the area of finances if the child can learn from good or bad financial decisions you make.
After that incident I voluntarily left the social media platform I had been interacting with and left all the social media groups I had signed into. I was looking for like minded people or people who wanted to dialogue thoughtfully about an issue. I found neither of those on social media. I just hope the majority of black fathers do not have the opinions and values I read that day!
Friday, April 26, 2019
Black Families - Find the truth
Some black families still suffer from the ravages of the American institution of slavery that was legal in these United States up until 1865. An organized method to transition black people from being enslaved to being independent, educated, and economically free was never put into place. Individual families continue to try to find a way out of poverty, disorganization, and chaos. Many of the new generation of black people do not know where we came from and what those before them went through so that they can enjoy the life they have now. So they embrace lifestyles that European Americans push out to them as being normal. Society tries hard to push God out of your life and human choices as a replacement. Understand that there is a God. Next, learn your family history.
Monday, April 8, 2019
The Man Made "Immigration Crisis"
The United States of America. The self proclaimed bastion of Freedom and Opportunity. The same country where European Americans massively immigrated to a land hundreds of years ago then inhabited by Native Americans. Native Americans did not have a formal "immigration policy" designed to keep European Americans from becoming settlers. No wall was built on the East coast to ward off the European newcomers. There may have been forced attempts to keep European Americans from becoming "citizens" in the "new" land. But for the most part European Americans were free to enter what was to become the United States of America.
That entry soon turned into a massive takeover of lands previously claimed by Native Americans. Native Americans were uprooted, forced off their property, and diseases spread by European Americans that resulted in numerous deaths to the Native American population. The triple threat of disease, political trickery, and forced removal effectively cleared the way for European Americans to take over what had been Native American territory.
European Americans then found themselves with a massive country to build from the ground up. Cities and transportation systems were developed along with all that was needed to support the European American ideas of civilization. Unable or unwilling to do the hard work needed to build the country into their image, European Americans turned to enslaving free people from the continent of Africa. Forced immigration under the name "slavery" was the European American solution.
During those years of forced slavery, fellow free European Americans continued to flow into the United States. Opportunity for European Americans existed and there was no immigration crisis.
Now we move forward some 500 plus years. As the percentage of people with Hispanic heritage grows in the United States comes the news that we have an "immigration crisis". Our safety is now in danger! A wall on the southern border of the United States needs to be built! The purpose of the wall? To keep "those people" out. Even the President of the United States has declared that we have enough immigrants. Time to close the door.
We all know where the decision came from. It is based in an economic/racially charged emotional decision. People who do not look like European Americans are not wanted by a large segment of the population. Forgotten are the open door policies of the past where people looking for opportunity to prosper and lead a "good" life were welcomed with open arms and few restrictions.
We all know that we are in more danger from the people already in the United States. Few of the mass killings that have occurred in the past years are due to a failed immigration policy. Many of the mass killings were done by European American males who suffered from mental instability or who were just filled with hate. Changing the immigration policy will not stem the number of deaths occurring from domestic terrorist acts, no matter what you are told to the contrary.
Politicians and culture haters have created the immigration crisis. Yes, there may be a need to refine the rules of how and when immigrants can enter the United States. This has been done in the past. But, many politicians have turned the faults in the system into an emotional campaign of fear and hate. Playing to the emotions of people continues to be an effective way to garner and develop emotional hate towards an issue.
Maybe in this coming round of Presidential campaign politics, common sense and respect will rise to the top of the pile of human emotions. There is no immigration crisis. There is a need to refine and reconstruct the administrative system of managing entry into the United States.
European Americans know that they gained all of the wealth they have today based on Native Americans not having the same views that European Americans have today towards "immigrants". Is that why immigration raises such a fear in some circles? Do you fear that what happened to the Native Americans may one day happen to you? Is that why the notion of gun control will never happen? People who fear the unthinkable will always want a means to protect themselves having learned from the policies of the past.
Discussion and action on the issue of immigration must occur now.
That entry soon turned into a massive takeover of lands previously claimed by Native Americans. Native Americans were uprooted, forced off their property, and diseases spread by European Americans that resulted in numerous deaths to the Native American population. The triple threat of disease, political trickery, and forced removal effectively cleared the way for European Americans to take over what had been Native American territory.
European Americans then found themselves with a massive country to build from the ground up. Cities and transportation systems were developed along with all that was needed to support the European American ideas of civilization. Unable or unwilling to do the hard work needed to build the country into their image, European Americans turned to enslaving free people from the continent of Africa. Forced immigration under the name "slavery" was the European American solution.
During those years of forced slavery, fellow free European Americans continued to flow into the United States. Opportunity for European Americans existed and there was no immigration crisis.
Now we move forward some 500 plus years. As the percentage of people with Hispanic heritage grows in the United States comes the news that we have an "immigration crisis". Our safety is now in danger! A wall on the southern border of the United States needs to be built! The purpose of the wall? To keep "those people" out. Even the President of the United States has declared that we have enough immigrants. Time to close the door.
We all know where the decision came from. It is based in an economic/racially charged emotional decision. People who do not look like European Americans are not wanted by a large segment of the population. Forgotten are the open door policies of the past where people looking for opportunity to prosper and lead a "good" life were welcomed with open arms and few restrictions.
We all know that we are in more danger from the people already in the United States. Few of the mass killings that have occurred in the past years are due to a failed immigration policy. Many of the mass killings were done by European American males who suffered from mental instability or who were just filled with hate. Changing the immigration policy will not stem the number of deaths occurring from domestic terrorist acts, no matter what you are told to the contrary.
Politicians and culture haters have created the immigration crisis. Yes, there may be a need to refine the rules of how and when immigrants can enter the United States. This has been done in the past. But, many politicians have turned the faults in the system into an emotional campaign of fear and hate. Playing to the emotions of people continues to be an effective way to garner and develop emotional hate towards an issue.
Maybe in this coming round of Presidential campaign politics, common sense and respect will rise to the top of the pile of human emotions. There is no immigration crisis. There is a need to refine and reconstruct the administrative system of managing entry into the United States.
European Americans know that they gained all of the wealth they have today based on Native Americans not having the same views that European Americans have today towards "immigrants". Is that why immigration raises such a fear in some circles? Do you fear that what happened to the Native Americans may one day happen to you? Is that why the notion of gun control will never happen? People who fear the unthinkable will always want a means to protect themselves having learned from the policies of the past.
Discussion and action on the issue of immigration must occur now.
Saturday, April 6, 2019
My Annual "Escape from the Worldly News"
It is that time again. The pronouncements on television news shows regarding "Breaking News" has once again gotten on my nerves. It's a reminder that someone somewhere has decided to bombard me with video and audio of events in the world they have decided I need to see and hear about. From among the hundreds of thousands of events occurring in the world, someone has digested those into 13-20 stories I am forcefully being fed. That is if I consent to sit in my chair and allow the TV to bombard me. But, I have chosen not to be bombarded.
I have served notice to my spouse that the only thing I want to know is the weather forecast; if there is an escaped criminal in the area I should be aware of; and if there are any food recalls or other health emergencies. Other wise why do I need some stranger bestowed with a title of importance to tell me what is the latest "news"? If I want to find out the news I'll seek the info from the variety of internet sites and then determine if what they are showing is truly news or just human gossip or human interest stories.
If I don't watch the news what am I truly missing? Apparently not much because each day I survive without hearing about the myriad of ridiculous events, crimes, and misdemeanors happening around me or in the world. Yes, many are tragic stories. But the fact is there is nothing that will change in my life based on most of the stories I see and hear. So why bother to watch the news? Go out and make your own news. But make sure your news has a positive outcome. Don't go out to adversely impact the lives of someone. Do a good deed. Help someone overcome a problem.
Sure you are going to miss out on hearing about the antics of people, and the absurdity of what people can do. Ask yourself what have you lost in not hearing what you already know about the nature of people? We are violent, we suffer from bouts where we can't control our emotions. We use artificial substances for a variety of "pleasures" only because we can. What benefit are you receiving by hearing about the same events day after day after day?
I saw no benefit to the regurgitation of daily non sense especially in the political arena. I don't need to know that another person is running for the office of President of the United States. I only need to read about the viewpoints and ideas of that person when it is time for me to decide who to support.
Save yourself from the "news" that really is not news. It's just drama packaged into 30 minutes because for years that was the forum to tell you what people want you to know. Go for a walk, read a chapter in a book, go to a movie for real pretend drama that is made to entertain you.
Take at least a month off then check back in to see if you really missed "the news".
I have served notice to my spouse that the only thing I want to know is the weather forecast; if there is an escaped criminal in the area I should be aware of; and if there are any food recalls or other health emergencies. Other wise why do I need some stranger bestowed with a title of importance to tell me what is the latest "news"? If I want to find out the news I'll seek the info from the variety of internet sites and then determine if what they are showing is truly news or just human gossip or human interest stories.
If I don't watch the news what am I truly missing? Apparently not much because each day I survive without hearing about the myriad of ridiculous events, crimes, and misdemeanors happening around me or in the world. Yes, many are tragic stories. But the fact is there is nothing that will change in my life based on most of the stories I see and hear. So why bother to watch the news? Go out and make your own news. But make sure your news has a positive outcome. Don't go out to adversely impact the lives of someone. Do a good deed. Help someone overcome a problem.
Sure you are going to miss out on hearing about the antics of people, and the absurdity of what people can do. Ask yourself what have you lost in not hearing what you already know about the nature of people? We are violent, we suffer from bouts where we can't control our emotions. We use artificial substances for a variety of "pleasures" only because we can. What benefit are you receiving by hearing about the same events day after day after day?
I saw no benefit to the regurgitation of daily non sense especially in the political arena. I don't need to know that another person is running for the office of President of the United States. I only need to read about the viewpoints and ideas of that person when it is time for me to decide who to support.
Save yourself from the "news" that really is not news. It's just drama packaged into 30 minutes because for years that was the forum to tell you what people want you to know. Go for a walk, read a chapter in a book, go to a movie for real pretend drama that is made to entertain you.
Take at least a month off then check back in to see if you really missed "the news".
Saturday, February 23, 2019
Sports Fiasco - Robert Kraft/Anthony Davis
New England Patriots owner Kraft caught in a human trafficking sting. NBA player Anthony Davis playing 20 minutes a game as the NBA condones his team pretty much throwing games.
A player for the Kansas City Chiefs, a running back, lost his job based on a video that showed him pushing around a female. The violence displayed against a woman and the NFL's no tolerance rule was the reason for his dismissal from the team. That player recently received an offer from a team to hire him back for one year.
With that in mind, what should happen to Kraft for supporting human trafficking through his actions? Should he be suspended for a year or more until he does some form of restitution? He surely can't continue to be the owner of an NFL team? Is supporting human trafficking not as evil as violently pushing a woman around? We will see what type of punishment the commissioner of the NFL gives the owner.
Next up. The New Orleans Pelicans in what they claim is an attempt to protect their "property", Anthony Davis, only play him approximately 20-25 minutes a game, regardless if playing him longer would give them a chance to win a game. This is telling fans, "yeah, we know you paid $140 for a ticket to a game with the hope of seeing him play the whole game. But forget about it!" Anthony is our property, our slave, and we need to ensure he is in prime condition when he goes on the slave market after the season!
I thought about going to see Davis play when his team came to town. But, then I thought, why spend $130 plus to see somebody play a restricted game of 20 minutes or less? Is the NBA stupid or what? What is the NBA commissioner thinking? The NBA just instituted rules to govern the "resting" of players that teams were doing, depriving again fans of seeing star players when they came to town. Now the NBA condones teams behaving like slave masters and keeping property under control?
Fans! Be smart and don't just throw your money at the NBA. If teams hold back players, just watch the game on TV. Don't spend your money on NBA tickets. Go out and have a nice dinner. $130 can buy a family of 3 to 4 a good meal. Even better, it will buy a nice meal for two people paying $130 a ticket!
Sports often time reflects society. In the case of Kraft and Davis, it is showing how hypocritical sports can be. Let your opinion speak with how you spend your money in supporting these sports. If they don't give you what you expect, give them nothing.
A player for the Kansas City Chiefs, a running back, lost his job based on a video that showed him pushing around a female. The violence displayed against a woman and the NFL's no tolerance rule was the reason for his dismissal from the team. That player recently received an offer from a team to hire him back for one year.
With that in mind, what should happen to Kraft for supporting human trafficking through his actions? Should he be suspended for a year or more until he does some form of restitution? He surely can't continue to be the owner of an NFL team? Is supporting human trafficking not as evil as violently pushing a woman around? We will see what type of punishment the commissioner of the NFL gives the owner.
Next up. The New Orleans Pelicans in what they claim is an attempt to protect their "property", Anthony Davis, only play him approximately 20-25 minutes a game, regardless if playing him longer would give them a chance to win a game. This is telling fans, "yeah, we know you paid $140 for a ticket to a game with the hope of seeing him play the whole game. But forget about it!" Anthony is our property, our slave, and we need to ensure he is in prime condition when he goes on the slave market after the season!
I thought about going to see Davis play when his team came to town. But, then I thought, why spend $130 plus to see somebody play a restricted game of 20 minutes or less? Is the NBA stupid or what? What is the NBA commissioner thinking? The NBA just instituted rules to govern the "resting" of players that teams were doing, depriving again fans of seeing star players when they came to town. Now the NBA condones teams behaving like slave masters and keeping property under control?
Fans! Be smart and don't just throw your money at the NBA. If teams hold back players, just watch the game on TV. Don't spend your money on NBA tickets. Go out and have a nice dinner. $130 can buy a family of 3 to 4 a good meal. Even better, it will buy a nice meal for two people paying $130 a ticket!
Sports often time reflects society. In the case of Kraft and Davis, it is showing how hypocritical sports can be. Let your opinion speak with how you spend your money in supporting these sports. If they don't give you what you expect, give them nothing.
Thursday, February 21, 2019
Zion Williamson Injury - a Humbling event for us all!
Those of us who intended on watching the newest college basketball sensation, (the list exists every year) were humbled last night some 40 seconds into the North Carolina vs. Duke game. Zion Williamson was injured last night as one of his basketball shoes self destructed while he was making a basketball move on the court. Ironically the Nike brand shoe in question was related to Paul George who himself endured and recovered from a serious leg injury a few summers ago.
The media hype surrounding the game was that a ticket to the game rivaled the prices people had paid for recent major events such as the recent NBA all star game. So it was truly justice that we were all reminded who was in charge. Some people allegedly had paid $2,000 for one ticket. When I heard that price I did think to myself that kind of money could feed a lot of people! This was supposed to be the biggest game of the college season so far. I could only laugh out loud thinking how all of us who had turned to watched the game were being taught a lesson. What is the importance of a basketball game in relation to other events in life? We were given the answer less than one minute into the game.
There are more important things. Yes, games are a distraction from the harsh realities of this life. But, we need to remind ourselves and continuously put things in perspective. Even an ex President of the United States fell for the hype and was present to watch the game! We all hope Zion will recover quickly and that his career will continue into the professional ranks. If we were all placing college basketball into the realm of idol worship, we were taught not to do so last night.
Thanks for the reminder. I am re grounded and ready to move forward.
The media hype surrounding the game was that a ticket to the game rivaled the prices people had paid for recent major events such as the recent NBA all star game. So it was truly justice that we were all reminded who was in charge. Some people allegedly had paid $2,000 for one ticket. When I heard that price I did think to myself that kind of money could feed a lot of people! This was supposed to be the biggest game of the college season so far. I could only laugh out loud thinking how all of us who had turned to watched the game were being taught a lesson. What is the importance of a basketball game in relation to other events in life? We were given the answer less than one minute into the game.
There are more important things. Yes, games are a distraction from the harsh realities of this life. But, we need to remind ourselves and continuously put things in perspective. Even an ex President of the United States fell for the hype and was present to watch the game! We all hope Zion will recover quickly and that his career will continue into the professional ranks. If we were all placing college basketball into the realm of idol worship, we were taught not to do so last night.
Thanks for the reminder. I am re grounded and ready to move forward.
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